The most strange and wonderful Saturday night of my life

DATELINE: August 4 2013
Patricia E Lyon

We returned from a miraculous day in the villages dehydrated, ravenous and pleasantly exhausted. Deanna drank 3 cans of stuff from the tiny refrigerator. Then we had cheese and crackers. I don’t know why we were hungry, because at Khnar Thmei we had yummy treats of steamed sticky rice around various fruit wrapped in banana leaves.

After showering with various gels, we made dinner plans. We called downstairs for one order of fish and chips. We share. (not the shower). The fish are fresh water fish. Makes our Friday nights in Wisconsin seem pretty dried out and greasy at the same time, if you know what I mean.

Then we began searching through our TV options. We couldn’t get into the Catherine Heigel thing. I was busy counting and sorting for next week’s classes all over my bed and floor. Then we found Dr. Seuss’ Lorax.

But the best, the most wonderful thing came as a surprise. For a couple hours we watched a Russian variety show without subtitles. The emcees were: a man that looked like Liberace in a sequined suit, a larger version of Cher, and a Drag Queen with a mirrored helmet with a star on top. He/She was wearing goggle glasses, a lot of make up and large yellow orthopedic shoes. Deanna said it was a drag queen gone awry. There was an older, distinguished woman who seemed to be providing more thoughtful commentaries. We liked her the most but we don’t know what she said.
The audience was seated at round tables with what looked like tall glasses of beer in front of them. The level in the glasses never changed. The entertainers would be seated at the tables after their performance wearing something else.

There was jazz, near opera, romance traditional folk, and we do not know. Our favorite was a group in the most incredible costumes that looked very Uzbekistaniesque. We are still confused by the soloist whose back-up singers wore short flight attendant outfits and stilettos.

Finally we couldn’t take the not knowing any more and resorted to the Star Channel in English. We watched a program called “Nail Files” about a shallow woman in L.A. who has a nail polishing business like Jersey-licious. Brainless and could not be compared to the Russian variety show.